My Darling Sweetheart

"I know you've most likely received the next wedding dress. It's quite delicate, isn't it? You're most likely also wondering why I've received another wedding dress from my grandmother. She gave it to me with a note.

'My Dear Lilli,

   As you might have realized, this dress has shrunk in size comparison to the last one. As I give it to you, I remember wearing it after what seemed like a long storm of grief. It was as if I stood as a new person. Freed from anything and anyone I'd known in the past, I remember looking at my love as I walked down the aisle, once again.

   He was the same, but his eyes beamed with a new gleam as if he knew bringing me through that type of grief would find us together in that moment. He told me, in our vows that day, he'd marry me over and over again if, in our newborn life together, death shall do us part. I looked at him quizzically and agreed wholeheartedly. "I will." I said. He smiled and kissed me ever so gently. And we were married, once again.

With Love,
Grandmother Westerland'

I hope you think the dress is as beautiful as I do. I was so small dear I never fit into it again after that day. Should it find it's way to you my darling sweetheart, so shall the mending of your broken heart. Believe in true love... & true love shall be your home."

Suzie Sateri

Celebration of Life

I posted a poem yesterday that I wrote when I was approximately 11 years old when my Grandfather, whom I loved dearly, passed away.

"Beautiful flowers on the grave, why is everyone so afraid?
Stop your tears because someone is here to save you from all of your fears.
God is up there and he is down here.
He will save you from all of your fears.
When your time has come he'll lift you up, into the breathtaking heavens up above.
God is with you so don't be afraid when you see flowers on the grave."

---

We recently saw a man, receiving CPR at Disneyland. I couldn't help but pray. Please, don't give up, I know you're tired, keep going, don't give up, I said to the First Responders.

I walked to a different area and made eye contact with a highbrow. I had hope again. Maybe there was some way he could be brought back to life. My footprints were full of hope.

"Peter Pan" took a deep breath and said,
"Okay, he's me."
He must have flown to "Neverland".

Returning after a while, the children showered "Peter Pan" with love and affection.
"Do you think he saved his life?" I asked. "Yep." He responded.

---

I went to the house. It is just skin and bones. "Jack and Sally".

---

I've recently read an article about a man (a teacher at my nephews school, a coach for my nieces team), who volunteered to search for a missing person in Mt. Baldy. During the search rescue, his body was found.

The community agreed in prayer this afternoon.
Amen.

Suzie Sateri

Beauty and the Beast - The Royal Theatre

Chip

"I thought about the note from my Grandmother and I decided, much like the story of the Beauty and the Beast, to take the things into consideration.

I had been recently told by the Dentist that I needed a root canal.
A channel to connect me to my true roots (is how I thought of the procedure).

Sometimes things can reach people when people can't reach people.
Things like this wedding dress.

Should it reach you, take good care of it, in the best way you can.
Believe, hope and have endurance during moments when life and love are seemingly unbearable."

The Wedding Dress

"By the time she reaches you (the Wedding Dress), she's a few months prior to being 100 years old." I begin to read the handwriting of my dear Grandmother as I hold this beautiful wedding gown in my arms.
..."I remember when my Grandmother gave it to me. She didn't speak much of it, but handed it to me with a note that read:

'...Love suffers long and is kind;
love does not envy;
love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
does not behave rudely,
does not seek its own,
is not provoked,
thinks no evil;
does not rejoice in iniquity,
but rejoices in the truth;
bears all things,
believes all things,
hopes all things,
endures all things.
Love never fails.'

When you wear this wedding gown, you will stand in the armor of understanding that in your marriage, will manifest, create and exist this type of love."

Suzie Sateri

Mary Poppins and Burt and the Pearly Band

The Hip Hop

Baby I'd like to give you wings.

Wings to fly.
Wings to swim.

Wings to cover the land.
Wings to soothe the pain.

Wings made of light gold.

I've become a baby.
What will I endure with the blessings I've been given?
To save a life.

Yes, baby, I'd like to give you wings.

Wings to fly.
Wings to swim.

Wings to cover the land.
Wings to soothe the pain.

Wings made of light gold.

Rest in my shadow and allow me to endure.
For you have a brilliant, beautiful life to live as do I have to give.

Will this be the sole version of us always baby?

Yes baby, I'd like to give you wings.

Wings to fly.
Wings to swim.

Wings to cover the land.
Wings to soothe the pain.

Wings of light gold.

Suzie Sateri

Cinderella - Voctave

Disney Fly Medley

Hugs and Hand Holding

"Can I pet your dog?" The toddler said to me. 

"Yes you may. Thank you for asking." Was my reply. 

I stood there as my dog went on her back in her most vulnerable position to get belly scratches from the little ones. 

"Pet her belly (I showed an example of the way to pet her as in a way not to pet her privates)." 

She was thrilled to get love and attention. 

I was exhausted and my son was still asking for my attention. As I was trying to get him to go to sleep I reached a moment where I was at the end of my rope (so to speak). At that moment, he found my hand with his hand and he held my hand and went to sleep. The feeling of holding his tiny hand in mine was worth every frustrating moment leading up to that one. 

My son has just started school and the first few days have been really hard for me. I've struggled with the decisions of whether or not to send him. My original plan was to write curriculum for Disneyland and educate him alongside me and my younger son with the new curriculum. I want him also, to make friends and develop meaningful relationships in a safe environment outside of our family so ultimately decided to send him to school. Every day he's wanted to stay with me and I love having him around. When I met him at the gate after school he approached me with a heartfelt smile and gave me a sweet hug hello. 

Whose Voice is it Anyway

If you ever reach a point in your life when you feel like you just can't face another day, listen to the voice inside of your head of someone you love saying to you, "I love you".

And when the voices of fear and negativity get louder, drown them with that little voice saying, "I love you", until you get closer and closer to it.

Even if all you do all day and all night is listen to the small voice saying, "I love you", you've done what you needed to.

Drown the voices of fear, doubt, insecurity and negativity to make that little voice that says, " I love you" louder, until it's the only one you can hear.

When it's the only one you can hear, begin to pray a prayer of thanks for that little voice that says, "I love you" and realize you're loved and you're needed more than you can understand.

Pray for guidance to understand how you can be helping that little voice.

That little voice that says, "I love you"...

It could be the voice of God living inside of you.

Baby Blues

You and I are babies.
When I realized that, I realized what true love means.

Us together, our parents treat us like their babies.
They don't give themselves to us as they do when we're together.

How much we love each other... truly.

Our love is at the soul level.

Bound not by time or people...
but forming together in time, by people.
I love that... how our loved ones see a future in us, for us.

We’re learning what true love is.

We give one another the freedom to be who we truly are, in each moment.
Bound not by time or people...
But forming together in time, by people.

We’re given time and space to become what we're striving to be... together.

True love.

Suzie Sateri

John Legend - All of Me (Edited Video)

Your Name Changed

I didn't realize it was you, it's always been you.
The stars have been guiding our hearts to see.

I didn't realize at the time.
At least not to my knowledge.

But I look at you now.
I look at you when you wear me.

It's you who has believed in me all along.
It's you who has carried me through.

That's how you feel.
I didn't know back then.

I missed you so much.
You lifted me.

I didn't realize at the time.
I let the light guide me.

Your wings looked so different.
But I loved them still.

Now I look at you when you wear me.
You're a strong man mostly thanks to my Mother.

Suzie Sateri

Golden Son

You’re always on my mind. 

I think someone is fine
my eyes want to look with amazement
When I catch a glimpse of you
realize you’re the one I want to look at more. 

I see that smile light up your face
The one that made me like your person
from the first moment we met. 

I see you and wonder
when I’m with you
Am I sleeping or awake
The lines just stay blurry
raising our children together. 

We love to see you smile
our children and I
We understand those smiles erupt
when true happiness occurs. 

The Gift

This is probably the first year I've ever known what I wanted to get my Mom for her Birthday. My sons and I walked into the shop to the area I knew it was. I asked for the price and was given the answer. "Can I have it?" I asked, delighted it was within the budget I set for her gift.

The man referred to it as the best in the world and I thought to myself, yes, it is.

When I left the shop I thought about what he said. I wondered if he was reading aloud what I thought about it. Yes, I do think it's the best thing in the world.

My son asked, "Can I give it to Grandma?"
I replied, "Yes".
He smiled, "I'm excited and nervous to give it to her."
I smile with more than just my mouth.

Suzie Sateri

Something Special Children's Book

This is my children's book, Something Special, written with poetic thoughts and creative illustrations inspired by Iranian artwork, Canadian artwork, nature, artwork based off of ideas and Moon of Mine.

Love,
Suzie Sateri

Moon of Mine Children’s Book

This is my Children’s Book, Moon of Mine. The kid talks to the moon as it goes through it’s monthly cycle (based off of NASA’s moon cycle from the month of November, 2014). I hope you enjoy!

Love,
Suzie Sateri

RN

I sit down at the table with my new pen in hand. It says two letters I'm familiar with as a result of a family history full of them... RN.
It was in the drawer of a piece of furniture my Mom bought Michael and I for our Birthdays. I opened the drawer, expecting no more than emptiness and I found it.
The pen matches the particular piece of furniture it was in. It's relatively ancient. I look at it and think, "It's gorgeous!". Not to mention, it writes well.
I love it. Not for what it is exactly, but because it gives me thoughts of hope, health, love, healing and wellness.
A gifted piece of furniture, sourced from some of my favorite people and RN's, arrives this pen. Was it intentionally placed in the drawer for me?
I wonder.
And so I decide to make it work.

Suzie Sateri

U.S. vs England Women's World Cup Game

   I have some coins my Father gave me recently that are World Cup 1994 coins. These are valuable coins, not just because of their value, but because I went to the 1994 World Cup final game with my Father. We had good seats, it was hot and a guy in one of the seats behind us had a stroke during the game. I remember details like that. Especially that guy because I remember looking at him and wondering what was happening to him followed by him having the actual stroke and members of the Emergency Crew swarming around to help him.

   That Brazil vs Italy game went into shootouts and ended with Brazil as the winner. I was playing club soccer at the time and was extremely passionate about the sport. I'd grown up going to cheer for my Dad's team every Sunday as a kid and having the opportunity to attend that final game was such a gift. The game was exciting all the way up until the last goal. I am forever grateful for the memories I have surrounding the sport of soccer. Of course I hope that guy who had a stroke lived through it and had a happy life.

   As a human being, we know what it's like to be passionate about life. We know what it's like to feel sad, and what it's like to feel happy, excited, upset, tired, energized... We have empathy for one another's suffering and great joy together through triumphs. Even animals have human like qualities when it comes to characteristics such as these. 

   I went to visit my parents with my sons today and when I walked into the house, the U.S. vs England Women's World Cup game was on. I was delighted to sit and watch the remainder of the game with my Mom and Dad. We even had my 2 year old son running around the table toward the end of the game, chanting, "U.S.A., U.S.A.!!!". 

   We were happy to see the U.S. win and celebrate with hugging and elated emotions! And, of course, when the player from the England team was laying on the ground after the game, my 4 year old son asked, "What is she doing laying on the ground?", I had to pause with empathy when I replied, "She's probably crying." Then we watched as the other tear filled eyes England player waved to the crowds. She had the look in her eyes that told me she was happy, even though her team didn't win, because she gave it her all. 

   My Father always told me when he was my soccer coach, if you walk onto the field and give everything you have to each moment of the game, you will exit the field with happiness, even when you're sad because your team didn't win, knowing you gave it your all. I was so happy to celebrate with the U.S., knowing when we cheer for the U.S. team, greatness happens all over the world. And I was blessed to look into those eyes of the woman from the United Kingdom, reminding me of the beautiful lessons, forever ingrained in my soul.

Suzie Sateri

Generational

I've been looking at the houses of our parents and parent's friends going up for sale recently. Simultaneously, admiring the fact that our parent's friends, parents and family are, once again, showing us how much they care for us. Giving us shade like a tall tree to a young boy in a sunny garden. One generation to the next.

While we're getting situated in our forever home, buying our forever home, or planting the thought seeds about the possibility of living in our dream home, the generation who raised us is continuing to do so by closing doors of the past and opening bright possibilities.

While we were looking at places we could "potentially afford", our guides are teaching our spirits to believe bigger and better. The generation who raised us are opening the houses that we grew up in. We know those houses and love them. We loved playing in them, sleeping in them, swimming at them and simply feeling at home in and around them.

Instead of knowing a house is for sale and not having the courage to walk through the open house because it's "out of our price range", we are excited to walk through the house to reimagine the great memories that continue to live in those spaces. We're guided to think of pure and happy memories that make a home.

To those of you who love, support, raise and lead us, thank you, once again, for giving us the freedom to pursue happiness and find life in our living. One generation to the next.

Suzie Sateri

Hi Dad

Dad,

There is not one time in my life that I didn't feel loved by you.
Yes, sometimes discouraged from your lectures.
Once in a while disappointed when I made a mistake and you believed better for me.

But not once, throughout our ups and downs, did I not feel loved by you.
Dad, you've carried me through so many difficulties in life.
Dad, you've celebrated the greatest moments with me.

Dad, there is not a day that goes by that I don't feel loved by you.
Even through your anger I see your smile.
Even through your tears I see your happy soul.

Dad, I remember you told me "Wisdom has many eyes".
I see yours through the friends and loved ones who I hold so dear.
Dad, I've lived 38 years of my life, knowing I have a Father who loves me.

I think of the past memories of you and our family with a smile in my heart.
When I look to the future I want to freeze each moment I have with you.
Dad, you've been the greatest source of hope and light in my life.
Through your lessons of wisdom I've constantly understood, I have a Father who loves me.

I love you,

Suzie

Lnad

"We honor land." 

Luck Prosperity and Good Fortune

Once in a while I'll look around and try to categorize people. I'll think to myself... Okay, this particular race is (Insert description). Or, this certain religion is (Insert description). Or this language is for (Insert description). Or, if someone looks like this then (Insert description). Whenever I try to categorize like that, I realize that not all people who look like that, speak/write like that, are a certain religion or a particular race are (Insert description).

I loved what I read years ago in the Bible because it said, "Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other." - Genesis 11:7. I've thought about what I read for years. The father of my sons and I have some art work we got for our first apartment together. We had to ask about the significant meanings of the writing and symbolism within the pieces. I love those pieces of art like the beginning of a love story. Like the bones of a good house or like the "Jack and Sally" of all characters.

After years of exploring different pieces of art together as well as painting together some of our own work, I sit back and stare at those first pieces of art we got for our first apartment. I think about that verse I read and wonder if our languages were confused at that time in our relationship on purpose. Perhaps we could only understand each other sometimes.

Each time I find myself beginning to categorize people, I think about the verse I read and realize it's the same type of concept. Not only our language is confused sometimes, but also the way we look, our religion and our race... Is that what wisdom and love truly stand for? None but the pure essence of humanity that is all encompassing.

Suzie Sateri

Permeated Love

My kids have the most incredibly stimulating conversations with me. My son asks me questions that help me in each moment to learn, to gain perspective. My baby is just learning to talk so our conversations are usually without words.

I understand my kids are a part of me and a gift from the Almighty. Sometimes when I am talking to them I realize it's actually similar to God talking to me. A way of letting me know what kind of love I've been gifted with and am just beginning to learn to appreciate.

I want the best for my kids 100% of the time. And for the times I treated myself so carelessly, I'm learning how to be better.

I know when we go though struggles it's going to fragment us. Because, Mom and Dad, I'm realizing who you are in your fragmented pieces. And our generation, we're so broken we like mostly to share the baby pieces of us. Aren't those the loved ones?

God thinks we are just as perfect as we think our children and, for the parental units, grandchildren are. We love to watch them and laugh when they're being naughty and it warms our hearts to watch them being nice.

Mom and Dad, just know when you hug and hold them, when you look at them with those gentle eyes, when you share your life and your wisdom with them, you're holding those fragmented pieces of us that just adore you and would do anything for you. Among our pieces, with you, we discover the essence of what has always made us whole.

Your love permeates every fiber of our being.

Suz

Dream Space

I had one of my favorite dreams again. One where I was navigating new space, making it my own.

When I was a kid I had a dream about this house that had stairs and tunnels. The spaces were clean and pure. I couldn't see the entire house, just the spaces I could get to. I'd crawl from one space into the next and just sit in it and enjoy. I dreamed about that house several times.

Now the space I dreamed was different. Perhaps I was creating the type of space I love for my kids to enjoy.

Stan the Dog

I wrote a character, years ago, that was inspired by the grandmother of a friend because she called her cat a puss. I ended up killing the creation of this cat/puss character with no explanation. Now it haunts me like a walking dead person who I love dearly (lung cancer).

Eyes Thankful

I see posts about TGIF and I realize I haven't celebrated a Friday in a long time. There is no difference anymore what day of the week it is. I realize all of this, these zero breaks from emotions, expressions of human characteristics is just what it is, human. And through it all, we are who we are.

Sometimes I want to hide. Just show my face through the good times, when I have the chance to make sure my teeth are sparkling and my face is beaming with a smile. Now I understand I am more of service to myself and others when I am able to embrace my good qualities along with the flaws. A normal human being.

I want to feel pretty and like I am going to have fun again in my life. As I'm thinking those type of thoughts my son tells me he likes something I like least about myself in all seriousness. And he tells me he loves to stare at me all day long. I feel pretty again, but in such a different way than before. A way that makes me smile in my eyes, my heart and soul.

I love everything about my sons. I love to stare at them. I love their hugs, their snuggles, their laughter and light. I love when they express their crankiness, their gratitude, their thoughts and words. I love when they're a bit naughty and very nice.

Chip

“May the force be with you.” “And also with you.”

You stood next to him and I looked at the both of you.
It was difficult for me not to shed tears.
He looked at me deep in the soul with the eyes of my baby.

As he holds your hand I’m taught wisdom and love from a distance. One that helps you forget your hurt and pain quickly. One that teaches me with grace and understanding so I may bless your life with every fiber of my being.

Every piece of you, I love. I understand they’ve been with me, for me.
I’m learning to grow, whole heartedly in the pieces I’ve become with you, for you.
I watch you both, as you experience the path God has provided your mind, body, spirit and soul.

While you let go of the pieces of the past that made you feel temporarily paralyzed, my tears flow like a spirit soaring as you give me the courage to let you fly.

May you always find peace in all of my pieces.

Suzie Sateri

Lincoln’s Gettysburg Speech

This is a plaque of Lincoln’s Gettysburg Speech at Disneyland in the Lincoln Theatre.

The Song

If I could write to you words about the song I just played on the piano (I’ll never play that song again) it would say something like you are turning into babies. Before, it was to protect others. This time, it’s to give you a break. To show you all of the love, appreciation, kindness, compassion and care you’ve given to those around you. It’s time for your eyes to be full of light and love. It’s time for you to accept all of the grace and mercy you’ve been blessed with. For even in your moments of failure and darkness, the Almighty held you in “His” loving wings like a baby in the womb. Some parts of you, mind, body, soul and spirit remain in the unknown for reasons only God knows.

Suzie Sateri

Keyboard

Crystal Cove

Shaba’s Brother

I was telling Ellington and Maximillian when they throw rocks/pebbles in the water to make a wish just like when they toss coins into a wishing well so Ellington was saying, “It’s so beautiful!” when he was looking at the water.

Just Fly Sweetheart

When you think you’re suffering from mental illness,

You could be really helping a pregnant person.

When you are in pain,

You could be really helping a woman give birth.

When you are tired,

You could be helping someone remain calm.

When you are living in a big house, 

You could be opening doors for others.

When you are living in a small house,

You could be the cure of someone’s loneliness.

When you give someone a smile,

You can brighten their life.

When you give someone a hug, 

You can heal their broken heart.

When you give someone a kiss,

You can make them feel like it was their first.

When you love someone,

You can create a life full of happiness.

When you allow someone to love you,

You can give them wings to fly. 

Suzie Sateri 

Complete Water Works Procreate Sketch

I have the image to describe this Water Works idea now. So I’m going to save it to my images.

Go to the wrench on the top left, Share, JPEG, save image. 

Now I can share with you, from my IPad photos, the new waterfall that can be placed outside of children’s hospitals... etc. that are so “beautiful, smart, healthy, clean...” that people can’t help but put good thoughts into the water that is (under the surface) connected to a human body. 

Procreate Sketch Water Works Continues

Now that I’m ready for layer 5, I chose my inking type and on the far right corner I’m going to make sure the color wheel is on black so we can see the sketch. Then, back to the paint brush button for the pen. 

When you’re ready to look at just the photo/sketch page, lightly tap the corner of the IPad to make the other gadgets disappear. 

Now I did a free handed sketch on top of the first layer (not really-I traced a transparent sketch on top of the IPad). And I added another layer again to not show something at the top. So, now I want to make the sketch look a little less bold so I’ll go to the wand on the top left and under “Adjustments” 

push the “opacity” button. 

Then, slide your finger along the top of the screen to dull the layer as much as you choose to with the small blue line starting from the top right corner to the left. 

Procreate Sketch Issues

The good thing about when you don’t like something or it didn’t work out like you wanted it to, you can delete a layer and add another one until you get it right.
So now I went to the first layer and piched the painting together until it was the right size for my next layer.

Now I’ll push the check mark on layer 5 so that layer is active again and continue. The other layers I’ll leave without a check mark so I don’t see them. I now just see the 1st and 5th layers and the 5th layer is where I’ll sketch. 

Make sure the blue is on layer 5 and then open the paint brush gadget. 

I’m going to go with “Inking” to sketch and use the “Technical Pen”. 

Procreate Sketch Water Works Pic and Layering

Now that I have my blank canvas I’m going to put a picture on it. This is also a picture I created with Procreate when randomly painting. So now I can access it because I saved it to my photo gallery. From the wrench button, then the “Add” button I’m going to open “Insert a Photo”. 

Insert the photo of your choice from your IPad gallery. Next, click the blue arrow button to hold the picture in place. 

Now you’re going to want to add a layer. Go to the top right corner of the app that looks like 2 sheets of paper. 

Push the plus sign to add a layer and the blue will show you what layer you’re going to be working on.. 

I want to sketch something on top of the picture and be able to explain layer by layer what I want this to look like/how it needs to function... 

So, now I’ve opened up a number of layers because I keep running into issues. 

Procreate Sketch Water Works

The first step is to open the + at the top corner of the app so you can open up a new blank canvas to create with. When you press the + sign you will see a menu option like this..

I usually choose to open the “Screen Size” so I have the largest canvas at my fingertips. Open that and you will have a clean canvas to work with that looks like this..

When We Have an Apple Pencil and the Procreate App

Procreate App Cartoon Sketch Titled - The Number Two Reason

My son’s hand under the door while I’m going to the bathroom 

Sharing a Procreate Sketch

When it comes to sharing a photo of your Procreate Sketch you go to the wrench on the top left side of the app and click the button that says “share”. Then JPEG.

Click the “Save Image” button and it will save to your photo gallery.

And then you can share your sketch just like you would a photo.

Sketching with the Procreate App Plus Time-lapse Video

Back to where we were with the Procreate lesson...

Once you have the 2nd layer aligned with the first layer, it’s time to sketch with your Apple Pencil. 

When you are done, or during your sketch, you can look at your sketch by clicking the check mark on the right side of your layers next to the layer you don’t want to see.

Now that you have completed the sketch, you might want to share it with your family and friends... For this you will need to go to the wrench on the left hand side of the Procreate App and open the button that looks like a video camera and click the button that says, “Export Time-lapse video”. 

You’ll then see something like this... 

Save to videos.

You probably are already familiar with how to share videos from your photo and video gallery. 

Dumbo Exclusive Movie Sneak Peek

Magic Carpet in the Grand Californian Hotel at Disneyland

A China Cabinet in the Grand Californian Hotel