Permeated Love

My kids have the most incredibly stimulating conversations with me. My son asks me questions that help me in each moment to learn, to gain perspective. My baby is just learning to talk so our conversations are usually without words.

I understand my kids are a part of me and a gift from the Almighty. Sometimes when I am talking to them I realize it's actually similar to God talking to me. A way of letting me know what kind of love I've been gifted with and am just beginning to learn to appreciate.

I want the best for my kids 100% of the time. And for the times I treated myself so carelessly, I'm learning how to be better.

I know when we go though struggles it's going to fragment us. Because, Mom and Dad, I'm realizing who you are in your fragmented pieces. And our generation, we're so broken we like mostly to share the baby pieces of us. Aren't those the loved ones?

God thinks we are just as perfect as we think our children and, for the parental units, grandchildren are. We love to watch them and laugh when they're being naughty and it warms our hearts to watch them being nice.

Mom and Dad, just know when you hug and hold them, when you look at them with those gentle eyes, when you share your life and your wisdom with them, you're holding those fragmented pieces of us that just adore you and would do anything for you. Among our pieces, with you, we discover the essence of what has always made us whole.

Your love permeates every fiber of our being.

Suz

Dream Space

I had one of my favorite dreams again. One where I was navigating new space, making it my own.

When I was a kid I had a dream about this house that had stairs and tunnels. The spaces were clean and pure. I couldn't see the entire house, just the spaces I could get to. I'd crawl from one space into the next and just sit in it and enjoy. I dreamed about that house several times.

Now the space I dreamed was different. Perhaps I was creating the type of space I love for my kids to enjoy.

Stan the Dog

I wrote a character, years ago, that was inspired by the grandmother of a friend because she called her cat a puss. I ended up killing the creation of this cat/puss character with no explanation. Now it haunts me like a walking dead person who I love dearly (lung cancer).

Eyes Thankful

I see posts about TGIF and I realize I haven't celebrated a Friday in a long time. There is no difference anymore what day of the week it is. I realize all of this, these zero breaks from emotions, expressions of human characteristics is just what it is, human. And through it all, we are who we are.

Sometimes I want to hide. Just show my face through the good times, when I have the chance to make sure my teeth are sparkling and my face is beaming with a smile. Now I understand I am more of service to myself and others when I am able to embrace my good qualities along with the flaws. A normal human being.

I want to feel pretty and like I am going to have fun again in my life. As I'm thinking those type of thoughts my son tells me he likes something I like least about myself in all seriousness. And he tells me he loves to stare at me all day long. I feel pretty again, but in such a different way than before. A way that makes me smile in my eyes, my heart and soul.

I love everything about my sons. I love to stare at them. I love their hugs, their snuggles, their laughter and light. I love when they express their crankiness, their gratitude, their thoughts and words. I love when they're a bit naughty and very nice.

Chip

“May the force be with you.” “And also with you.”

You stood next to him and I looked at the both of you.
It was difficult for me not to shed tears.
He looked at me deep in the soul with the eyes of my baby.

As he holds your hand I’m taught wisdom and love from a distance. One that helps you forget your hurt and pain quickly. One that teaches me with grace and understanding so I may bless your life with every fiber of my being.

Every piece of you, I love. I understand they’ve been with me, for me.
I’m learning to grow, whole heartedly in the pieces I’ve become with you, for you.
I watch you both, as you experience the path God has provided your mind, body, spirit and soul.

While you let go of the pieces of the past that made you feel temporarily paralyzed, my tears flow like a spirit soaring as you give me the courage to let you fly.

May you always find peace in all of my pieces.

Suzie Sateri

Lincoln’s Gettysburg Speech

This is a plaque of Lincoln’s Gettysburg Speech at Disneyland in the Lincoln Theatre.