Golden Moments

I choke back the words I would have said and try to open my mind.
I hope you understand and make the best of what you hear.

I try to remember what I wanted to say, what I wanted to write.
In those golden moments.

You kissed me like you were explaining to me where you are.
I understand and hope you enjoy.

When you give yourself permission to be imperfect you practice perfection.
 It's a different way of learning.

What happens to you is private, between you and the almighty.
So forgive yourself as quickly as possible and turn your lemons into lemonade.
Let go of shame and self-doubt.

Sometimes the only way to understand the unexplained is like reaching the unreachable.
And the only way to mend this golden heart is by holding it.

Yeah, I know I should be writing every single day instead of slumping in this chair the size of a child in front of the computer.

You're my greatest distraction. 

Andra Day's "Rise Up"

Like a Cloud

My soul looks at it
The way she holds like a cloud
So we can have rest

Soul Water Baby

When we hold a child, we hold a soul.
The deep underground water.

Their cries tell us a story we might not otherwise have the ability to listen to, nor understand.
In that deep water is a soul here to be loved unconditionally.

Their laughter is as sweet as birds chirping through a radiant sunrise.
In that deep water is a soul here to love us unconditionally. 

Mom

Go Figure

I didn't know you were loving me when I felt most unlovable. Go figure.

Alessia Cara - Scars To Your Beautiful

Like Beautiful Fireflies

What I really want to know in the end is, will he be able to forgive me?... to forgive us with his whole heart? Will I be able to forgive him?... to forgive them with my entire heart? I know we will.

It's hot in here and I'm trying to think about going back to sleep again. I'm staying awake, wondering what time the delivery service is going to happen with fresh items from the farm. Looking out the door at the city lights flickering like beautiful fireflies.

I understand he is waiting for me and I love him so much for that as I am waiting for him too.

I also understand that stars have scars uncovered in space when the right timing aligns. The stories we carry make us shine so bright in the night sky. And he is one of them because of me.

I still love him with everything I have and everything I am. Once in a while I'm reminded of how much I need him. When it happens I find myself practically screaming his name or running to his side for comfort.

We walked by him twice. The first time he was sitting calm on a bench. One could sense the fire in his soul so kept our distance. The second time his vulnerability made my heart melt.

The first time he was defending me for the second time.

The delivery has arrived and I'm glad I left the lights on because it's still dark outside.